Sunday, January 07, 2007

xiaopei is in a confused state. not knowing what to do with the team anymore.. i'm sure alot of the dance ppl heard bout out team talk yest and wanna know what happen.. and yea.. u all should know..

gin made us sit down tog and talk.. first thing she ask us to do is to take out a piece of paper each and write down the name of the person tt we personally feel like kicking out.. we can choose not to write but of cos those who have thoughts wrote.. and then we were asked to take out another piece of paper again and write down the style of the person we like in the team.. all results onli gin knows.. when we submitted these 2 pieces of paper.. she read through it and tears dropped.. she told us it's very saddening to know that the ppl who wanna kick this person out.. is the person whom show all of us the most respect.. how hurtful it is.. i swear i did not write anything on the first piece of paper.. cos i feel i m not good enuff to comment on anyone.. i jus hope the team works.. tt's all..

she told us to sit down in a circle.. and all 5 guys all separated in their own teeny weeny corners.. and roy was given the task to bond the guys.. which i feel is good.. i hope it works.. and yea.. we thrashed out everything..we go person by person and everyone commented on what they r unhappy with.. i beleive there are still some who have their own talks and refuse to speak up but yea.. i'm glad tt at least i did my part in speaking up whatever i m not happy with.. ppl who never speak up.. i hope u all dun talk behind among urselves.. if not.. i will slash ur tongues off.. haha...

she spoke to me the night before at FB party.. and she told me.. as an instructor she see us liddat.. so not bonded and have to draw such a clear line between seniors and juniors.. it's very saddening.. she say if we manage to get into finals and get any awards.. and imagine the team go on stage receive the awards tog.. but when going back to back stage.. everyone take their things and go off their own way.. she as an instructor will also feel sad for us.. cos this is not a team..

she split my tasks to the team equally.. ensuring tt everyone is contributing something.. :) i'm glad and i hope this works.. giving each and everyone of us some sense of responsibilty.. the team has been reliant for so long.. everyone knows this problem has been circulating around.. everyone knows tt there are jus some free loaders in the team.. but the free loaders arent making effort at all to even farking reflect until yest when we thrash things out.. and i hope this prob will not surface again.. if not everything has to go round round round and round again..

i'm experiencing very low confidence plus low morale now.. i dunno what i can do to boost my confidence also.. like mel say.. it is all up to me to overcome it.. i know.. i m trying.. but how? i'm glad tt i still have frens ard who is like supportive.. like ah siao they all.. but most of my frens.. even not dancing frens.. r encouraging to leave the team.. they find it no point staying.. when bonding and stuffs is not there.. but gin haven even give up on us.. is it right for me to give up? i dunno.. seriously farking confused..

and ppl.. i know u all will come and read my blog.. those who haven pay me the knee guard money pls take the initiative to.. or u all realli waiting for me to open my mouth to ask the money from u all? it's not a very nice thing to do u know..but yah.. i'll have to do it if neccesarily..

and yes.. i got a sweety cutie octopus from unice babe.. u reali very tang guo.. haha.. love the gals.. they have been nice supportive.. comments they give.. like yah.. everything and everything.. love u gals.. thanks.. kisses to u all..

went to one of the FB party last sat... jingwen's bdae party.. cos wayne asked me to go.. and yea.. had quite a nice chat with him there.. bitch bout lotsa stuff.. his gf.. huimin.. haha.. i tink if loren and joan sees this.. she's gonna laugh her heads off.. like woohoo.. haha.. but now they r ex.. and yea.. chat with some FB ppl also.. and all of them is calling me sai now.. cos i always say sai la.. or pi la.. and the combination they came up with is pi sai(nose shit).. like wtf.. haha.. hilarious ppl.. i also had a nice chat with their president.. rachel.. she's a sweetie sweetie pie.. she ask me how's life being the incharge of the team.. and we shared alot of experiences.. she told me each team got their own prob.. their team major prob is bcos they dun have insturctor and very hard for juniors to respect them cos they dun have someone professional to guide them.. but yah.. look at the FB now.. they r doing so well now.. this shows tt rachel has been doing a great job.. i'm so proud of her..and yes.. the party.. 6 generations of FB ppl turn up can.. this is how united they r.. gin batch was there.. and even gin senior was there i heard.. until now.. xyz batch and his juniors.. like omg.. for tp.. mayb if u wan like one batch of 20 ppl come down.. i tink super hard lo.. not i wanna say.. but yah.. look at the concert celebration with the pathetic 15 of us.. and usual splitting into gangs tt kinda stuffs.. like yah..and yes ppl.. pls look out of FB musical in april.. woohoo.. i'm looking forward to it.. r u?

Yxiaopei'er♥

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